January, 2007

January 1, 2007

Today's Punchy Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Hospital officials in Romania are investigating the case of a doctor who was punched by a "corpse" in the morgue. The doctor had to be treated for shock after being punched by teenager Bogdan Georgescu. The incident took place after the doctor thought he saw Georgescu move, and bent over to investigate. The youngster, 16, was taken to the morgue at Brasov County Hospital in Brasov after collapsing and showing no signs of life. He was declared dead on arrival and his body was moved to the morgue. The teenager said: "I woke up and had no idea where I was, I looked to the left and to the right and saw dead women on either side of me, and then I saw this man coming towards me in a white coat. I just panicked. I thought he was going to kill me." The youngster, from Fagaras, is now being treated in the neurological ward to find out the cause of his collapse. He said: "The last thing I remember is drinking coffee with my brother, and then I woke up in the morgue." The doctor was allowed to take time off work after being treated for shock.

Culled from: iOl
Generously submitted by: Paradox

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If I woke up in that situation, I'd be punching the guy too! But of course, that's because I watch too many movies like Hostel.

With the end of 2006, we also mark the end of the infamous despair@shocking.com e-mail address. It has been a heart-wrenching decision, but I have decided that I cannot justify the extra expense to retain the old e-mail address, so from now on, please send your missives to comtessedespair@gmail.com. Now, let us all bow our heads while TAPS is played...

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Morbid Merchandise!

At the request of an Asylum Inmate, I have created my own version of the "Friends Help Friends Move / Real Friends Help Friends Move Bodies" t-shirt. It is available in a short or long-sleeved version from the Juror2.Net Ebay shop. Please take a look and let me know your thoughts. Suggestions for improvements or ideas for future merchandise is always welcome!

A Plethora Of Viscera!

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"My Brush With Morbidity" by Erro

"I work as an embalming apprentice in a very high volume funeral home, so I see things everyday that would probably qualify for tons of Brushes With Morbidity. Though they'd be more like Bludgeons With Morbidity, considering our case load!

"I could talk about the 22 year old girl who OD'd on heroin and left a very pretty corpse. Or the equally young and pretty girl who fell and hit her head, and died from an allergic reaction to something the ER gave her to control brain swelling...

"Or last week, when I picked up a body at the morgue of a large hospital, I looked to my right while inside the cooler. There was a rack loaded with plastic bins. I noticed small white bags in the bins. Based on their labels, there were about 20 babies in that cooler. Knowing that and seeing it are two different things, though. Small white bags just don't have that much impact unless you see what's in them.

"Today (1/1/2006) kind of topped those.

"This afternoon I picked up a two year old boy from the M.E.'s office. It was my first child case.

"His DC (death certificate) listed cause of death as 'blunt force trauma' and the 'Homicide' box was xx'ed out. Quarter sized bruises covered his entire body and it appeared that either his collar bone or neck had been fractured. He had an apple sized fresh bruise on the right crux of his neck/shoulder area.

"It was hard to ignore the sight of the huge gaping Y-incision that dominated his entire torso. When you looked at his little face, you were distracted by the incision along the back and sides of his head where his calvarium was cut away in a wedge during the cranial autopsey. You could see inside his skull, past the freshly barbered hair, rudely sliced skin, inner musclelayer, and then his brain. Usually the brain is included in the chest contents bag, but I guess he was so small (about 20 lbs) that there wasn't room for extra.

"There was ink on his fingers and soles of his feet where he had his prints taken. There was blood clotted at the back of his head, where it leaked out of his barely attached calvarium and scalp flap. We will take care of this later, when we embalm him. He will be lovingly washed and cleaned up. We will also sew up all the incisions in his body and cover his bruises with makeup. By tomorrow he will look peaceful, like he is only sleeping.

"I had wrapped the body bag in a sheet when I loaded him into a van. When I took him out of the van I didn't get a cot for him. I carried him into the prep room in my arms. I laid him on a dressing table and proceded to check him in to the system so we could take care of him.

"He was two years and one month old.

"He had a birthday last month.

"He had Christmas last week.

"And then on New Year's Eve, someone beat him to death.

"Happy New Year."

Very well-written, erro... packs a whallop!

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Morbid Link Du Jour!

Robert sends a very interesting link:

"Texas Execution Information Center is a very well-researched site that simply presents the facts of the cases -- and of the executions. The author remains studiously neutral on the subject, almost to a fault. I think you'll enjoy the site."

http://www.txexecutions.org/

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Morbid Caption Contest!

Here's the concept: Send me your funniest headline for this story:

An elderly Romanian man mistook his penis for a chicken's neck, cut it off and his dog rushed up and ate it. It said 67 year-old Constantin Mocanu, from a village near the southeastern town of Galati, rushed out into his yard in his underwear to kill a noisy chicken keeping him awake at night. "I confused it with the chicken's neck," Mocanu, who was admitted to the emergency hospital in Galati, was quoted as saying. "I cut it ... and the dog rushed and ate it." Doctors said the man, who was brought in by an ambulance bleeding heavily, was now out of danger.

The winner receives a highly fashionable Morbid Fact Du Jour 10-year-anniversary t-shirt. Send your entries to captions@asylumeclectica.com. Contest closes Wednesday, January 3rd, Twenty-Oh-Seven.

 


January 2, 2007

Today's Rotten Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Three Thai men died while unloading rotting fish from a boat in Hutan Melintang near Teluk Intan. Another Thai man was almost overcome by fumes but managed to crawl out of the boat's hold in time. The dead men were identified as Anaing, 24, Achin, 28, and Kajem Prasit, 27. Yong Thai, 31, managed to escape. The bodies of the dead men have been sent to the Teluk Intan Hospital. The incident happened at 11am when the four men were unloading fish from a fishing boat at the fish landing jetty there. One of them was then instructed to unload fish from the boat's hold where there was also fish that was stale and rotting as they had been kept there for about 10 days.

"Upon entering the hold, he must have breathed fumes," Hilir Perak Deputy OCPD Supt Zainuddin said. When the three others heard their friend collapse in the boat's hold, they rushed down after him to help. One by one, they too collapsed. Fortunately, Yong Thai managed to crawl out and save himself. Investigations found that there were about 100 bags of rotting fish in the boat's hold and that the air-conditioning system was not working. "Samples of their lung tissue have been sent to the Ipoh Chemistry Department for tests," he said. Yong Thai, when approached, said everything happened so fast that there was little time to do anything.

Culled from: The Star
Generously submitted by: Bruce T.

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Really, you'd think they'd be immune to the fumes of rotten fish, considering the rather aromatic state of the Asian markets I've walked through. And, as a vegetarian, Asian markets are not my favorite places to visit.

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Wretched Recommendations!

Elsbeth has a film recommendation:

The Madness of Henry VIII (2006)

"Among other morbid but interesting facts were the open ulcerated sores on Henry's leg that oozed puss and just would Not be healed. I think, because of the leg, his activity levels were severely curtailed. This caused him to gain so much weight that he eventually weighed in at 350 pounds, and hat a 57 inch waist line. When he died, he weighed so much that he cracked the boards of his coffin. His blood dripped out and was licked up by the dogs. One of the wierder aspects of this, is that this was predicted sometime before Henry's death. I think by a disgruntled bishop, but don't hold me to that one."

Sounds fascinating!

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"My Brush With Morbidity" by Lorri

"I had my scalp 'degloved' in a car accident. The driver was drunk and going way too fast around a curve. I wasn't awake while I flew out the back window of the Camaro but I did wake up upon landing 100 feet down a mountainside to find myself covered in blood unable to move. It was 5:45am but it was a full moon that night. I held my hand up in front of my face and it was bloodsoaked. I had blood, leaves, and dirt in my mouth. Apparently when I went out the window (from the front seat) my scalp caught the glass and framework of the back window and tore from front to back. I know this because after being discharged from the hospital I demanded my family take me to see the car. (it broke in half, the hood came off and a door landed at the bottom of the mountain) My hair was still on the framework. I ended up with 40 staples and countless stitches underneath them. (also fractured my neck) Needless to say I have a pretty little scar that goes diagonally from the corner of my right eyebrow to the back of my left ear. I cut muscle and nerve and have a small dent in my forehead near my hairline. I should probably be dead but I'm still here suffering away with the rest of the world. LOL"

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Morbid Caption Contest!

Here's the concept: Send me your funniest headline for this story:

An elderly Romanian man mistook his penis for a chicken's neck, cut it off and his dog rushed up and ate it. It said 67 year-old Constantin Mocanu, from a village near the southeastern town of Galati, rushed out into his yard in his underwear to kill a noisy chicken keeping him awake at night. "I confused it with the chicken's neck," Mocanu, who was admitted to the emergency hospital in Galati, was quoted as saying. "I cut it ... and the dog rushed and ate it." Doctors said the man, who was brought in by an ambulance bleeding heavily, was now out of danger.

The winner receives a highly fashionable Morbid Fact Du Jour 10-year-anniversary t-shirt. Send your entries to captions@asylumeclectica.com. Contest closes Wednesday, January 3rd, Twenty-Oh-Seven.

 


January 3, 2007

Today's Badly Burned Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

An earthquake leveled the city of Calabria, Italy and more than 180 towns in the area around it on February 4, 1783. Huge fissures opened up in the earth, some of them 225 feet deep and 150 feet wide. Many people and livestock were swallowed up by these great chasms, from which powerful geysers of boiling water soon began spewing. Incredibly, the water lifted out some of those trapped in the fissures, a few of them still alive. Though badly burned, some of these lucky souls actually survived the quake.

Elsewhere, rivers and streams dammed up by debris created a wave of mud seventy yards wide and fifteen feet deep that flooded the town of Scilla. Fires broke out in the ruined cities and towns, and aftershocks plagued the area. The earthquake killed some 30,000 outright, while 20,000 to 30,000 others died as a result of the aftershocks and the famine that followed.

Culled from: The Pessimist's Guide To History
http://astore.amazon.com/theasylumeclecti/detail/006095745X/102-9980040-7664135

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It's a Plethora Of Viscera!!!

At the request of Magnoire on the MFDJ Discussion Group, I have added the "Real Friends Help Friends Move Bodies" shirt that I introduced a couple of days ago onto additional merchandise, including mugs, magnets, stickers, and more:
http://www.cafepress.com/plethoraviscera/2330548

I also expanded my Cafe Press shop (which also has a changed URL - http://www.cafepress.com/plethoraviscera) to include several more items, including a set of merchandise dedicated to one of my all-time favorite MFDJ quotes - from this November 17, 2002 fact:

"A Cambodian woman who murdered her husband by axing him repeatedly in the groin before running off with her son-in-law has been sentenced to 15 years in jail. But 35-year-old Chhoeun Sovann, from Kompong Thom province 100 km (60 miles) northeast of Phnom Penh, is not yet behind bars. Six years after the murder, prosecutors say they cannot find her. The verdict was handed down in absentia. In a case shocking even by Cambodian standards, Chhoeun Sovann set about battering her husband to death with the blunt end of an axe, the blows falling mainly on his groin. "She fell in love with her son-in-law, which was against her husband's wishes. Finally, she had to kill her husband so she could escape with her lover," female presiding judge Sim Samoeu told Reuters. "It is totally unacceptable in Cambodia that a wife should kill her husband by smashing his genitals," the judge said. "After hours of deliberation, I decided to punish her with 15 years in jail." She also awarded the victim's family compensation of two million riels ($500) -- nearly double the average Cambodian annual wage. Under Cambodia's notoriously erratic and ineffective judicial system, trials in absentia are relatively common as are cases of convicted criminals enjoying their freedom for years after receiving hefty jail sentences."

Here's my silly version of the "Smashing Genitals" quote:
http://www.cafepress.com/plethoraviscera/2332847

And if you forget the URL's to any of the stores, you can find them on the Plethora Of Viscera page at The Asylum Eclectica:
http://asylumeclectica.com/asylum/viscera/

Proceeds from the sale of any items from either the Cafe Press store or the Juror2.Net Ebay Store (http://stores.ebay.com/Official-Juror2-net-T-shirt-Store) go towards running the Asylum Eclectica website and the Morbid Fact Du Jour newsletter. As always, if you have suggestions for improvements or changes, please send them my way. Thank you!

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"My Brush With Morbidity" by Joseph

"The date is October 23, 1983. I was stationed onboard the USS IWO JIMA, it was early. About 6:30 word is passed to prepared to receive incoming wounded. During the prior months we started receiving almost daily announcements to prepare to receive incoming wounded, with one or two wounded Marines coming aboard. This day was different.

"At a few minutes before 7:00 I was called to the bridge and asked to direct the Navy contingent on a rescue effort, and to get 50 volunteers. I was then told that the Marine Barracks had been bombed. By 7:30 my volunteers and I were leaving the ship. The hangar bay was already filling up with wounded. My understanding is that later that morning the entire hangar bay was filled.

"We arrived at the Beirut airport and immediately went to the barracks site, which was a converted office building. I believe it was about 6 stories, with an atrium in the center. Its interior was adorned with Marble. The building was at one time by the Lebanese equivalent of the FAA.

"In the basement was a galley, where the morning crew was preparing breakfast. For the most part officers were located on the first floor, and enlisted on the upper floors. The Marine Medical Staff was on the first floor.

"We arrived to find the building collapsed on itself. I rounded up all the Navy personnel and assigned them sectors. Marines were already on the building pulling out survivors, as were local civilians. We established a triage area for the wounded, and a morgue site for the bodies.

"There were constant orders for silence so people could listen for noise from the rubble. There was occasion when we were order to halt work because of sniper fire, although I do not remember hearing any fire. After pulling out as many survivors as possible, we moved in heavy equipment to lift falling debris. I will not describe the bodies as I knew many of the men of died, but it was heartbreaking to lift a slab of concrete, to find the remains of good men flattened until the weight of the building. With each slab removed, we found more of out friends killed.

"The men in the basement were all killed, with the brunt of the debris having crushed them. Some men on the first floor were never found, having been literally blown apart. I have personally never known so many people killed at one time, and I hope never to have to see it again. I can only image the horrors of Sept. 11."

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Morbid Link Du Jour!

The Trauma Imagebank is a collection of fascinating trauma images - some gory, all interesting. Well worth a browse!

http://www.trauma.org/imagebank/imagebank.html

Link submitted by Borborygmy

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Morbid Caption Contest!

Here's the concept: Send me your funniest headline for this story:

An elderly Romanian man mistook his penis for a chicken's neck, cut it off and his dog rushed up and ate it. It said 67 year-old Constantin Mocanu, from a village near the southeastern town of Galati, rushed out into his yard in his underwear to kill a noisy chicken keeping him awake at night. "I confused it with the chicken's neck," Mocanu, who was admitted to the emergency hospital in Galati, was quoted as saying. "I cut it ... and the dog rushed and ate it." Doctors said the man, who was brought in by an ambulance bleeding heavily, was now out of danger.

The winner receives a highly fashionable Morbid Fact Du Jour 10-year-anniversary t-shirt. Send your entries to captions@asylumeclectica.com. Contest closes Wednesday, January 3rd, Twenty-Oh-Seven.

 


January 4, 2007

Today's Ripped Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

The body of an apparent stowaway was ripped in half during flight Tuesday and his leg crashed into a suburban neighborhood, where a homeowner found the severed limb in the middle of her lawn, authorities said. Pam Hearne heard "a loud crash" and later was stunned to see a foot clad in an Adidas sneaker and a sock in her yard, said Officer Thomas Blanchard. The leg, with hip and spine attached, dented the shingled roof of her garage before bouncing into the lawn. Police suspect the remains are from a stowaway who may have been crushed as the South African Airways jet lowered its landing gear on its approach to Kennedy Airport. Federal Aviation Administration spokesman Jim Peters said the pilot of flight 203 would have probably started lowering the plane's landing gear in the sky over the home in Floral Park, about 5 miles from the airport. Peters said a Customs agent that met the flight at the airport found another leg hanging from the wheel well. The airline said in a statement that the flight landed with "no impact" on the passengers and crew and it was working closely with authorities to investigate how someone may have stowed away. The flight originated in Johannesburg, and made one stop in Senegal. Authorities had not identified the remains, which were hauled away from Hearne's yard in a plastic bag. Hearne, a special education teacher, said that when she first saw the leg in the grass, "it didn't look real." "But I am very glad that I live where I do," she said, "so I don't have to run for my life like this man probably was doing."

Culled from: USATODAY.Com
Generously submitted by: Patina

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No, but you do have to run for your life to avoid falling legs!!

Thanks to everyone who sent in entries for the Morbid Caption Contest. The response was better than I'd dreamed: Over 100 entries! I'm going through them and will share the results in a few days. Good luck!

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Morbid Lyrics Du Jour!

Marco submits the following for morbid consideration:

"There's an old happy/funny/sarcastic folksong about the sinking of the Titanic. Here are the words, though the way it's sung is what makes it funny. It's all lilting and sprightly, especially the part about husbands and wives and little children. And everyone in the audience wails and laughs, 'SO SAD!' and 'TOO BAD!' And it requires banjos and kazoos."

The Titanic

Oh they built the ship Titanic to sail the ocean blue
And they thought they had a ship that the water would never go through,
but the gentle Lord raised up his hands
And he said that ship would never land.
It was sad when the great ship went down

Chorus:
Oh it was sad (SO SAD!)
Oh it was sad (TOO BAD!)
It was sad when
The great ship went down
(To the bottom of the sea) (Husbands and wives, little children lost their lives)
It was sad when the great ship went down.

Now they sailed away from England, and were almost to the shore
When the bloody snooty rich refused to associate with the poor.
So they locked them in the hay, where they could never get away...
It was sad when the great ship went down.

Chorus

They lowered a few life boats on a glassy eerie sea
And the band stayed on the deck playing Nearer My God To Thee...
While some were homeward bound,
Sixteen hundred had to drown.
It was sad when it great ship went down.

Chorus

Kaplunk, it sunk. What a brilliant piece of junk.
It was sad when the great ship went down.

Carrie enthuses: "OMG! The Titanic song has always been one of my favorites! And yes, the best part is it's sung so cheerfully! Its a very happy upbeat song. The version of the Titanic song I know has slightly different words here & there, and I have a couple of verses to add:

First of all, at the end of the chorus (It was sad so sad, it was sad too bad... sad when the great ship went down) we always finished with "To the bottom of the sea. Blub blub blub blub."
Here are my added verses,
Verse 2:

The Captain sat on deck with a tear in his eye
As he waved the last of his passengers goodbye
He thought he made a slip, so he went down with the ship, it was sad when the great ship went down.

Chorus:
Oh it was sad (SO SAD!)
Oh it was sad (TOO BAD!)
It was sad when
The great ship went down
(To the bottom of the sea) (Husbands and wives, little children lost their
lives)
It was sad when the great ship went down.

And the last verse:
The moral of the story is very plain to see
Always wear your life preserver when you go out to see
Cuz uncles lost their aunts, little biddy children lost their parents
It was sad when the great ship went down.....


"GREATEST SONG EVER! You have to hear it to appreciate the full humor."

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Morbid Link Du Jour!

Shauna sends a link:
"Here are some very creepy kitties... I want one!!!" So say we all, Shauna. So say we all.

http://www.messybeast.com/freak-face.htm

 


January 5, 2007

Today's Self-Pleasuring Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Like many Christian conservatives before and since, Dr. John Harvey Kellogg (of Kellogg's Corn Flakes fame) believed that masturbation, and in fact all sexual excess, was sinful -- "sexual excess" here defined as "sex for anything beyond reproduction". In Plain Facts for Old and Young, he advised that the first line of defense was keeping children busy and constantly under surveillance -- that is, working them daily to the point of exhaustion. The vigilant parent must especially be aware of a child's goings on in the bathtub, on the toilet, or in bed, for solitude was a temptation to vice.

Furthermore, all parents were urged to watch for such tell-tale "symptoms" of masturbation as bad posture (slumped shoulders), a fear of the opposite sex, and hanging out in groups with other children of the same gender. Stiffness in the hips in boys or a wiggly walk in girls were also clues. Also a child who suddenly became more bold -- or worse, more timid -- was surely a masturbator as well.

To stop these hideous acts of depravity, Kellogg strongly advocated circumcision of young boys (note that, up until this era, most non-Jewish American boys were not circumcised), stating that the operation should be done without anesthesia because the remembered pain (and the soreness which followed for several weeks) would serve as a lasting reminder deterring the child from rummaging.

Another deterrent recommended by Kellogg was to wire a boy’s foreskin together at the tip such that any mere erection would become very painful. The wire was of course to be attached by piercing the foreskin with a needle, with the wire following along in place of thread. For the multitude of American males who do not (thanks to Kellogg and his ilk) have a foreskin, it may be worth mentioning that the foreskin is considered to be much more sensitive to pain and pleasure than the bald penis you may currently own.

But Kellogg did not single out only boys for torment -- perish the thought! Girls too must be prevented from self-pleasuring, at all costs. For girls Kellogg recommended that application of carbolic acid directly to the clitoris was:

"an excellent means of allaying the abnormal excitement, and preventing the recurrence of the practice in those whose will-power has become so weakened that the patient is unable to exercise entire self-control."

Of course, now medical doctors know that carbolic acid is extremely poisonous. When applied to the tissues, and when applied directly to muscle or nerve, it causes instant paralysis. Nonetheless, if carbolic acid did not do the trick, Kellogg reasoned it was necessary to surgically remove the clitoris. He cites one such surgery, he performed at the request of the girl's father. Sure that his 10 year old would go to hell for her sinful indulgence, the father had resolved he would rather take her out in the wilderness and leave her to die rather than have her infect the minds of her siblings with her evil ways. Kellogg and cliterodectomy were her only hope for continued life and salvation. The good doctor happily obliged.

Culled from: Rotten.Com
Generously suggested by: Megan

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Of course I had to run out and purchase Plain Facts for Old and Young immediately - and it is, as they say in the midwest, a HOOT! Who would have guessed that simple old Corn Flakes sprang from the mind of someone so deranged? The book is available to read online from the University of Virginia Library:
http://etext.lib.virginia.edu/toc/modeng/public/KelPlai.html

And you can also download it for free as an e-book from the Gutenberg Project:
http://www.gutenberg.org/etext/19924

It's well-worth a read!

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Ghastly!

Steve O' forwards the following:

"Three Pedestrians Hit by Car

"The scene was all caught on tape. In video from the Fiesta Latina Market you can see the 30 year-old woman and her two children, ages four and 12, as they were struck by the car while they crossed the street. The driver of the vehicle was identified as Guadalupe Lopez, 79. Investigators said she and her 39-year-old daughter were pulling into the market when she lost control of the car Tuesday morning.

"Lopez left the scene of the accident, but turned herself in to authorities a short time later. Sgt. Joe McDonald of the Kern County Sheriff's Department says, "At this time the investigation has revealed that Guadalupe is unlicensed and why she was driving, we haven't determined that yet."

"The mother and her children survived. They were taken by ambulance to area hospitals with fractures and non-life threatening injuries.

"Lopez is under investigation for leaving the scene of an accident and driving without a license."

Looking at the footage, it's amazing the mother and the children survived!

http://www.asylumeclectica.com/asylum/morbid/archives/pedhit.wmv

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Wretched Recommendations!

Jenn has a film recommendation:

"I've got a movie I'd like to recommend for those of us sick enough to stomach it. It's called, 'I'll Bury You Tomorrow,' and although it's B-List and full of unattractive and unknown actors/actresses, it's perfect if you're a twisted mind such as myself. Murder, mayhem, blood, guts and a little necrophilia all make this movie-go-round. Check it out :D"

I'll Bury You Tomorrow (2002)
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/B0002D672U/theasylumeclecti

 


January 6, 2007

Today's Dangling Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

A 15-year-old girl found the body of her 12-year-old brother dangling from his bunk bed after he apparently tried to play a prank on his relatives by pretending to hang himself. Patrick Sanders' body was discovered on June 15, 2005 hanging from a dog leash attached to the bed. Sheriff's deputies and rescue workers were unable to revive him. The boy, who lived in Bloomingdale, about 20 miles northwest of Kalamazoo, was pronounced dead at South Haven Community Hospital.

Culled from: Associated Press
Generously submitted by: Paradox

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Okay, what I want to know is - why do they think it was a prank? Smacks of denial to me!

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Urban Exploration Link Du Jour!

Wormwood Forest: A Natural History of Cherynobyl is a book by Mary Mycio, who documented the "zone of alienation" around Chernobyl (lucky!!!!). Although I haven't purchased the book (yet), this website has an excellent gallery. Some of the shots - such as the "Elephant's Foot" of burned graphite that was left after the fire - are positively creepy!

http://chernobyl.in.ua/en/home

Thanks to Sandy for the link.

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Ghastly!

Skat sends a link to a ghastly collection of Iraqi war clips:

"I received this from a friend who's serving in Iraq. This is a link to the gallery page, where there are several video clips, including executions. I know this is just the list to send this to, but I still have to warn about the graphic nature of the clips. They're disturbing, to say the least..."

Indeed, those of a sensitive nature should definitely avoid the execution footage!

http://www.4th25.com/gallery.php


January 7, 2007

Today's Flesh-Eating Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Two KwaZulu-Natal girls have been left traumatised after witnessing their father eat the flesh off their dead mother's face. Police spokesperson Captain Tienkie van Vuuren said police were called to Thembalethu Village near Mkuze in the Tugela Ferry area at 3am on Friday, June 17, 2005 after a 13-year-old girl ran to her neighbours for help. She said when they arrived at the scene they had to force their way inside the house to rescue the other girl (7) who had also been stabbed on the head by the father. "Inside, police found the naked Jabulani Siphethu sitting on top of his common-law wife's body eating the flesh from her face," said Van Vuuren. "Only the forehead was still intact. The bone was visible where the rest of the face use to be". Siphethu was very aggressive during the arrest and threatened police with the knife he was holding. He was eventually apprehended and taken outside. "There, he suddenly choked and became unconscious and died. The seven-year-old girl was removed from the scene by ambulance together with her older sister who escaped unharmed," said Van Vuuren. She said a case of murder and inquest has been opened.

Culled from: Mail & Guardian Online
Generously submitted by: Grim747

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I can't say I blame the girl: nobody likes to see their parents suck face! <groan>

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Wretched Recommendations!

Dana has a film recommendation for us:

"I literally just got back from seeing The Prestige. Aside from making me want to kill the projectionist for screwing up his cues, it was an excellent film. It manages to be period in a subtle and believable way, bolstered by the great acting. It's dark overall, but it's the last five minutes that are really morbid. I'm hoping the DVD comes out soon, I'd love to hear the director's thoughts on this one."

http://theprestige.movies.go.com/

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Morbid Trinket Du Jour!

For those of you who still haven't purchased a new calendar this year, here's an excellent choice!

The 2007 Serial Killer Calendar
http://serialkillercalendar.com/calendarbuy.html

Thanks to Nina for the suggestion.

 


January 8, 2007

Today's Life-Sized Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

While there are many CPR dummies or mannequins on the market, the face of the one most widely used was modeled on that of an anonymous young woman whose body was fished from the Seine around the turn of the 20th century. It was believed she had taken her own life, but since she was never identified, no details of her life were known and the events leading to her demise remain a mystery. The unknown girl was entered in the books at the Paris morgue as "ecadavre feminin inconnu" (unknown female cadaver) before her remains were disposed of in an unmarked pauper's grave. A death mask was made of her features, but it is unclear if this was done in furtherance of attempts to establish her identity or because an unnamed morgue attendant was so taken by her visage that he took it upon himself to craft a memento of her beauty.

(It is not true that death masks were routinely made of all decedents who graced the Paris morgue with their presence. Instead, beginning in 1881, the bodies of up to fourteen unknown persons would be laid out in a chilled room fronted by a plate glass window before which an endless train of the curious would pass, in hopes that some of the passersby would recognize some of the morgue's unidentified guests. Unknown Paris, a volume of engravings from 1893 about the city's less savory landmarks, said of it: "There is not a single window in Paris that attracts more onlookers than this.") The death mask of the girl who came to be known as "L'Inconnue de la Seine" made it out of the morgue by unknown means and into the souvenir shops. Its serene beauty, displaying a calm repose the real girl had perhaps not known in life, spoke to people. The mask took on a life of its own, becoming a "must have" objet d'art, and several factories were engaged at once to produce it in vast numbers.

In the mid-1950s, Dr. Peter Safar, a pioneer in emergency medicine, developed a method of mouth-to-mouth resuscitation combined with chest compression; in 1958 he presented a paper on this technique in the Journal of the American Medical Association. Safar believed his methods could be employed by those outside the medical field to save lives, provided these laypeople were given adequate training in his techniques. To more effectively teach this procedure to them, he envisioned having a life-sized doll that novices to cardiopulmonary resuscitation could practice on, and so he approached toymaker Asmund Laerdal with the idea of developing a realistic mannequin for CPR training. Laerdal took up the challenge.

The face Laerdal used for his training dummy was that of "L'Inconnue de la Seine," the by-then well-traveled death mask of an unknown Parisian girl. The modern CPR dummy was built in 1960 and sold under the name "Resusci Anne." In North America she has been christened "CPR Annie." Many a student of basic CPR has been taught to check if a patient is unconscious by gently shaking the doll and calling, "Annie, Annie, are you OK?"

Culled from: Snopes.Com
Generously submitted by: Brian

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And here's an image of CPR Annie herself:
http://www.snopes.com/medical/graphics/cprannie.jpg

Cyn writes: "Actually - the story that I was always told was that Annie was infact Dr. Laerdal's daughter who died of drowning = he used her death mask to
create the mannequins and the originals (which were huge full body things) were to her proportions. Supposedly when she drowned everyone just stood there and watched her die because even though they fished her out of the water they had no idea what to do, which is why the mannequins were invented, so that no-one else's daughter would die like that (hmm that didn't work...) I've been teaching CPR for a long time and that is what I have always been told, though I don't have any good source for you other than a very old pamplet from the 70's about it. That is what they always said in EMT school too.... I remember as a kid peeling the eyelids open and looking at the blue glass eyes... used to creep even my EMT parents out.... now they are so generic they don't even have hair. oh well... so much for the good ol days."

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Ghastly!

In case you haven't heard, someone has leaked more footage of Saddam Hussein - this time it's post-execution footage from the morgue. You can see that the hanging ripped open his throat pretty badly and broke his neck. He was lucky - no lengthy suffering in death, like what sometimes happens with botched hangings.

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=c5daa5b733

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Urban Exploration Link Du Jour!

Mustard Gas Party is a collection of some of the most beautiful urban exploration photographs I've ever seen. Absolutely breathtaking!

http://b.f11.org/

Thanks to cricket for the link.

 


January 9, 2007

Today's Torturous Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Here's another particularly nasty variation on water torture employed by the Dutch in the 17th century, as described by writer Ernestus Eremundus Frisius:

"There is a bench, which they call the wooden horse, made hollow like a trough, so as to contain a man lying on his back at full length, about the middle of which there is a round bar laid across, upon which the back of the person is placed, so that he lies upon the bar instead of being let down into the bottom of the trough, with his feet much higher than his head.

"As he is lying in this posture, his arms, thighs, and shins are tied round with small cords or strings which, being drawn with screws at proper distances from each other, cut into his very bones, so as to be no longer discerned. Besides this, the torturer throws over his mouth and nostril a thin cloth, so that he is scarcely able to breathe thro' them, and in the mean while a small stream of water like a thread, not drop by drop, falls from on high, upon the mouth of the person lying in this miserable condition, and so easily sinks down the thin cloth to the bottom of his throat, so that there is no possibility of breathing, his mouth being stopped with water and his nostrils with the cloth, so that the poor wretch is in the same agony as persons ready to die, and breathing out their last.

"When this cloth is drawn out of his throat, as it often is, so that he may answer to the questions, it is all wet with water and blood, and like pulling his bowels through his mouth."

Culled from: The History Of Torture

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I think I'm going to adopt that last part as a new expression: "Watch the presidential press conference? Why, I'd rather have my bowels pulled out through my mouth!"

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Urban Exploration Link Du Jour!

Opacity is a collection of mesmerizingly beautiful urban exploration photographs. A must-browse!

http://www.opacity.us/locations/

Thanks to Paul for the link.

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Morbid Sightseeing!

Zubrovka sends a photo-essay of the Mount Olivet Cemetery in Nashville, Tennessee. Looks like a very nice place to visit!

http://homepage.mac.com/studio_zubrovka/PhotoAlbum10.html

Here's the official site for the cemetery for those who might like to visit:

http://www.mountolivet.com/

 


January 10, 2007

Today's Flammable Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

A Catholic Elementary School in Cologne, Germany

Thursday, June 11, 1964

Walter Seifert's wife died in childbirth a few years ago and because he had tuberculosis, he had been out of work for years. Walter wrote several letters about his unfair treatment by medical officers to the head of the health department, the director of the upper city and the head of the provincial government trying in vain to make a war pension valid. All of these failed. Several medical officers certified Walter with schizophrenia symptoms, but they did not think he was violent. Today, just after 9 a.m., he proved them wrong. Walter converted a garden sprayer into a flamethrower and filled it with an easily inflammable mixture that could deliver a six-meter flame. He took his new flamethrower, a lance that was 1.5 meters long and a homemade iron centrifuge to the Catholic elementary school at Cologne Volkhoven. The school consisted of three wood pavilions, containing six classrooms, near the main administration building.

He entered the school yard and blocked a small school gate with a wooden wedge. In the schoolyard, teacher Anna Langohr was teaching a group of girls about sports. Walter went to the first pavilion, which held four classrooms, threw some disks in with the centrifuge, put the flamethrower into an opened window and pulled the trigger. The wooden classrooms and the clothes of the children immediately caught on fire and panic ensued. Gertrud Bollenrath, a teacher, began to smoother the flames from the children's clothes before going out into the yard and putting herself in harm's way. Walter stabbed her with the lance. By now, the student's were running all over the schoolyard and Walter let loose another deadly flame. Anna, 67, tried to stay between the students and Walter, but the flames over took her and she collapsed to the ground.

Walter then began to approach another wooden pavilion. The teachers inside, Mrs. Ursula Kouhr and a teacher identified only as Kunz, saw him coming and tried to shut the wing doors, but Walter tore one of them off it's hinges. Ursula, 24, lost her balance and fell down. Walter stabbed the fallen teacher several times while she was on the floor, killing her. By now, the neighbors were responding to the fire and commotion in the school yard so Walter fled the scene into a field. He didn't get to far as the police apprehended him in the field. He didn't get much further than that either as, during the chase, he swallowed a cap of plant poison E605.

By the time the sunset on this horrific day, Walter had died in Lindenburg. Meanwhile, men who drove the garbage trucks were able to break down the gate Walter had wedged closed and extinguished the fire with blankets and clothes. They stopped cars in the street and had them transport the wounded students to area hospitals. The students had burns over 90% of their bodies. Eight students died from their injuries. Gertrud, 62, died just after 1:00 at Holy Spirit Hospital. Anna was in critical status for week and wasn't until October that she was able to leave the hospital . The 28 students who were wounded underwent months of long and painful treatment, which could not heal the scars completely, both physical and psychological.

Culled from: Columbine-Angels.Com
Generously submitted by: Kathleen

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Now, that's what I call a true terror-art-ist! Who would think to attack a school with a flamethrower? Definitely scores points for originality.

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Morbid Link Du Jour!

Here's an excellent website that discusses the early gravestone image styles in Cape Cod, Massachusetts, along with photographic illustrations.

http://www.capecodgravestones.com/styles.html

Thanks to Jessica for the link.

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Wretched Recommendations!

Em has a book recommendation for us:

Mutants: On Genetic Variety and the Human Body
by Armand Leroi

"I highly recommend Armand Leroi's book Mutants. It manages to be inexplicably upbeat while, at the same time, horribly depressing, a neat trick to be sure. Anyway, it's a beautifully written and thoroughly engrossing book, complete with a few choice anatomical illustrations and photos. It isn't just a cheap freak show in book form, but instead presents a meticulously researched picture of genetic mutation and its study, one that does not sensationalize its examples. Leroi depicts his subject clearly and unflinchingly. It's morbid fun, but the kind where you learn something and no one gets arrested for necrophilia. The quote on the back cover reads "Who are the mutants? We are all mutants." If that doesn't scream Comtesse-worthy morbidity, I don't know what does."

Indeed!! This is the second recommendation I've had for this one, so it definitely sounds like a winner.

 


January 11, 2007

Today's Cremated Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

To the ancient Romans, especially the rich upper classes, cremation was a common mode of disposal of the dead from pre-Christian times and into the second century AD. The explanation for the decline of cremation during the second century is largely unexplained, though some believe that inhumation became the preferred method of disposal because it was regarded as 'gentler' and more respectful. Certainly as early as AD 31 the Empress Poppaea, kicked to death whilst pregnant by her husband Nero, was inhumed and not cremated. A hybrid of burial and cremation, os resectum, continued to be practised, whereby the finger of the dead person was cut off and buried while the rest of the body was burned. The ashes were then preserved in cinerary urns and placed in the niches of columbariums.

Culled from: Death: A History Of Man's Obsessions and Fears

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How marvelous to be able to give someone the finger after you're dead!

Okay, I haven't forgotten about the Morbid Caption Contest - I just haven't had time to finish my selections (yeah, I know, a likely story...) But soon, though - very soon!

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Urban Exploration!

The Unquiet Tomb is an excellent collection of urban exploration photography. Highly recommended!

http://unquiettomb.com/

Thanks to Joe for the link.

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Ghastly!

One-Eyed Billy is a baby goat born with cyclopia. What a weird kid!

http://www.cybergoat.com/cyclopia/cyclopia.htm

Thanks to Jamie the Side Show Freak for the link.

 


January 12, 2007

Today's Diurnal Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Monitors are robust, diurnal lizards with long, non-autotomous tails and elongate necks. They are found in Africa, central and southern mainland Asia and Malaysian and Indonesian islands, Papua New Guinea, and Australia (where about half the species are found). The feeding biology of monitors is also diverse, ranging from Gray's monitor, which forages and eats mollusks and fruit, to the Komodo dragon, which is a sit-and-wait predator of large mammals such as deer and buffalo. Large monitors may also eat carrion, and both the Komodo dragon and the water monitor are rumored to be adept at finding, exhuming, and eating human corpses.

Culled from: Animal Diversity Web
Generously submitted by: Bruce T.

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Monitors: The Ed Geins of the reptile world!

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"My Brush With Morbidity" by Cynthia

"Going to an autopsy was one of my top '25 things to do in life before I die'. Several years into police work, I was to escort a recently deceased female to the state morgue for the medical examiner to determine if she died by domestic assault or not. As luck would have it, there were eight bodies to be autopsied that day (July 4th) and since we were last to arrive, I got to see the first seven also. Six of the eight were thought to be alcohol and/or drug related. One of the recently deceased was the state comptroller, who had been found naked and thought to be on viagra. Autopsy number three was a middle aged man who may have expired due to alcohol poisoning. When the medical examiner had the body rolled over on its side to look at the underside, a fart escaped the bloated body and filled the room with the most noxious odor. I mean, the insides of dead people is bad enough that the whole ride home I had my head out of the window to clear my nasal passages. But the dead mans fart was awful in that it combined the smell of a fart and the rotting insides of the dead. Watching the assistants saw open skulls using no facial masks and getting splattered with tissue was pretty gross. Seeing the bodies autopsied all the same way each time was anticlimactic and put me off wanting to be a forensic pathologist or medical examiner any more than I wanted to be a taxidermist or work in a slaughterhouse."

What a pity that you had a bad experience. But didn't Oscar Wilde say that when the gods wish to punish us, they answer our prayers?

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Morbid Art Du Jour!

Jessica Joslin creates incredibly strange and compelling artwork made from animal bones, antique hardware, glass eyes, and a variety of other materials. Positively creepy!

http://www.jessicajoslin.com/jessica/index.html

Thanks to Joe for the link.

 


January 13, 2007

Today's Vibrating Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Funeral directors in Ireland report that more and more families are throwing a mobile phone into the coffin with the deceased. They're more than just mementos, too. "There is a fear that some people have that they will be buried alive," says Dublin mortician Peter Flanagan. "They have contact with the outside world if they have a mobile phone with them." But, he says, he suggests to families they either turn the phone off, or at least turn it to vibrate. "Obviously," he says, "you don't want a phone ringing inside a coffin during a funeral."

Culled from: This Is True
Generously donated by: Carolyn

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That's just plain silly! If you can't get reception inside a subway, what makes people think they'll get reception inside a coffin?

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Morbid Trinket Du Jour!

Here's the perfect site for those of you who wanted to be a doctor but didn't get the grades to make it to med school... or, conversely, those of you who wish to emulate the surgical skills of Jack The Ripper. GoLimbs.Com sells medical simulation models that you can use to practice removing tumors, inserting catheters and airtubes, taking blood samples, and other lovely procedures. Playing doctor has never been so realistic! (Or expensive, sadly...)

http://www.golimbs.com/

Thanks to Steve for the link.

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Morbid Art Du Jour!

Joseph Seigenthaler's artwork is the perfect antidote to those who believe that the human body is beautiful. Blech!!!!!

http://www.joeseigenthaler.com/

Thanks to Moni for the link.

 


January 14, 2007

Today's Horrendous Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

The mother of a 7-year-old girl killed in a DWI crash recalled yesterday the unimaginable horror of sitting on the side of the road with her daughter's remains while rescuers cut the rest of her family free. "The only thing that was left of Kate was her head," said a surprisingly poised Jennifer Flynn about her adorable, apple-cheeked girl, who was killed when an allegedly drunken driver slammed into a limo loaded with six people returning from a Bayville wedding. "I took her, just that, and sat on the side of the Meadowbrook [Parkway] watching the horrendousness going on around me," Flynn said outside Winthrop University Hospital in Mineola, L.I.. "I sat there for about an hour with her as they cut my entire family out of this crushed tin can," the devastated mother said about the limo, which was turned into twisted metal and shattered glass after the smashup in Freeport.

Flynn was the only one able to get herself out of the limo. Also in the limo was little Katie's sister, Grace, 5, who is still under observation at Nassau University Hospital; the girls' father, Neil, 36, who is in critical but stable condition; Flynn's father, retired Nassau cop Chris Tangney, 58, and her mother, Denise, 55, an aspiring Long Beach city councilwoman Chris Tangney underwent his third surgery in just three days, this time to repair a fractured hip, while his wife is hooked up to a respirator. The 5-year-old girl is in good condition and should be released in the next few days, hospital officials said. The Long Beach family was on their way home from the jubilant wedding of Flynn's sister, Lisa — where Katie and Grace acted as flower girls — when they were rammed by alleged drunken driver Martin Heidgen, 24. "We were hit head-on by someone going 70 mph on the wrong side of the road," Flynn said. "It was like an explosion." The limousine's driver, Stanley Rabinowitz, 59, was also killed instantly.

A photograph of the precious young girl smiling coyly for the camera as she played in the sand was snapped just hours before her tragic death. "Katie was stolen from us," the stoic mother said. "Her life was cut terribly short. "She only had beauty, and we are so grateful for that, but it was taken, and it was taken with drunk driving," she said. Heidgen, who was driving in the wrong direction, suffered a broken ankle and was arraigned at his bedside at Nassau University Hospital on Saturday. He faces two counts of manslaughter as well as drunken-driving charges. If convicted, he could spend more than 30 years behind bars. Heidgen's mother, Margot, said her son "feels horrible" about the accident. "It's terrible," she said. "This is a tragedy."

Culled from: NY Post
Generously submitted by: Jill

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Imagine driving by THAT sight!!

Betsy sends me a follow-up on the drunk driving accident that was featured on the January 14, 2007 MFDJ. The drunk driver who slammed into the limo and killed two people has been found guilty of second degree murder. The article has interesting photographs of the wreckage - remember, this is the wreck where the mother held the decapitated head of her daughter in her arms as she sat dazed on the side of the road after the crash. Horrid. http://tinyurl.com/3apdxt

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Ghastly!

What's the only thing that is more frightening than a newborn baby? A STILLBORN baby!

And what's more frightening than a stillborn baby? A GALLERY of stillborn babies!!

http://www.missingangel.org/beautifulbabies.htm

Thanks to Willow for the link.

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Morbid Mirth Du Jour!

Oh, I'm so disappointed I didn't come up with this idea for a photo contest!

The Lego Suicides

Thanks to william13 for the link.

 


January 15, 2007

Today's Restrained Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

A Bengal tiger attacked and killed a teenage girl in August, 2005 at a southeast Kansas animal sanctuary. Haley Hilderbrand, 17, of Altamont, Kan., was posing with the tiger for her senior high school pictures at the Lost Creek Animal Sanctuary. A news release from the Labette County Sheriff's Office said the big cat was being restrained by its handler, but it attacked the teenager, anyway. The 7-year-old tiger was killed.

Culled from: ClickonDetroit.Com
Generously submitted by: Paradox

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Poor tiger - he was just acting on the natural impulse to kill a teenager.

I will try and finalize the Morbid Caption Contest results either Tuesday or Wednesday night, depending on whether my ailing immune system allows it. Right now, sleep seems the only appropriate course of action... but, then again, when doesn't it?

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Wretched Recommendations!

Mesbeth has a film suggestion for us:

Plucked!

A living-dead chicken struggling to survive among hungry humans discovers his own appetite for destruction in the offbeat fable Plucked!

Plucked! is a unique comedic recipe, blending elements of horror, science fiction and puppetry in an outrageous spoof. Follow the adventures of Fred, a headless but sentient chicken - the extraordinary result of an experiment gone awry during the Great Fast-Food Chicken Wars. Along the way, you will meet a good guy, a bad guy, and a hooker. Plus, you will encounter hordes of killer chickens.

Best (and cheesiest) of all, Fred and his fowl cohorts are meat puppets. That's right, chicken carcass marionettes! Nothing but the best of B-movie art for genre fans.

http://www.customflix.com/206577

http://www.pluckedmovie.com/

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Morbid Trinket Du Jour!

Here's a fantastic Psycho shower scene doll set! Of course, in a perfect world a doll of Norman/Mother would be included... alas...

http://www.shop.com/op/~Psycho_Madame_Alexander_Hollywood_Alfred_Hitchcock_40715-prod-14623265

Thanks to Magnoire for the link.

 


January 16, 2007

Today's Coasting Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

A West Virginia mother was killed when she was run over by her own SUV, as she was trying to save her kids. She was trying to stop the SUV from rolling down a hill with two of her children inside. Officials said the 25-year-old woman had gotten out of the vehicle with one of her children while two others were inside. One of the children got behind the wheel and put the Dodge Durango in gear. It started coasting off a driveway and Andrea Johnson got behind it to try to stop it. Officials said the woman fell after about 75 feet, went under the vehicle and was dragged about 50 feet before ending up in a drainage ditch. She was pronounced dead at a hospital. The sport utility vehicle then crossed a road, went over an embankment and hit a tree. The children were not injured.

Culled from: ClickonDetroit.Com
Generously submitted by: Paradox

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SUV's = Death On Wheels!

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Wretched Recommendations!

Kimmie has a couple of vintage gaming recommendations for us:

"There are two games that came out in the early to mid 90's. 7th Guest and it's sequel 11th Hour. As far as I know, they're PC only. They are puzzle games, and get harder as they go, but as you beat the puzzles, you get to more of the house you're in. I played 11th hour, and it was really creepy at times... from the murder in the kitchen, the blood covered switchblade in the bathroom, and the skeletal hand that guides you everywhere. Anyways, there's my recomendation for a creepy morbid game!"

7th Guest

The 11th Hour

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Creepy Techno Video Du Jour!

Em writes: "Daft Punk is an awesome band comprised of two French guys who dress up like robots. You may have heard this song of theirs on one of those iPod commercials. The real video however is far more fun."

http://tinyurl.com/y5pwbm


January 17, 2007

Today's Freaky Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

An inebriated Belgian woman died in a freak accident when she ended up beneath a heavy grave stone at a cemetery. The 33-year-old was on her way home from a bar in the Belgian town of Pulle in the early hours of Saturday, September 3, 2005 when she took a short cut through the cemetery. But she urgently needed to relieve herself and crouched down between two gravestones. As she lost her balance, she grabbed one of the stones which gave way and landed on top of her. The public prosecutor's office said she died of suffocation as she was unable to lift the heavy stone.

Culled from: Reuters
Generously submitted by: Paradox

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See, here in Chicago, they lock up all the cemeteries after dark so this sort of accident can't happen. It's a pity really - it would be an excellent way to eliminate Cubs fans...

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Morbid Caption Contest Results!

Okay, after some long hours of procrastination, it's time to announce the winner of the latest Morbid Caption Contest! To refresh your memory, here's the lovely morbid fact that it is based on:

An elderly Romanian man mistook his penis for a chicken's neck, cut it off and his dog rushed up and ate it. It said 67 year-old Constantin Mocanu, from a village near the southeastern town of Galati, rushed out into his yard in his underwear to kill a noisy chicken keeping him awake at night. "I confused it with the chicken's neck," Mocanu, who was admitted to the emergency hospital in Galati, was quoted as saying. "I cut it ... and the dog rushed and ate it." Doctors said the man, who was brought in by an ambulance bleeding heavily, was now out of danger.

First, let me say that I received over 100 entries, and over 30 of them contained some variation of "Choke the Chicken". Now, while I consider that to be very amusing and I am amazed and appalled that I did not think of that myself, because there were so many similar entries I decided to eliminate that theme from consideration for the top prize (although a couple well-constructed variations did make honorable mention).

There were so many excellent entries that I agonized for hours - absolutely EXCRUCIATING PAIN - trying to decide which was the best of the grim bunch. In the end, I decided to pick the entries that made me laugh out loud for the top five - and it's obvious that I'm a sucker for a catchy rhyme!

First of all, here's a list of Honorable Mention entries, which had originality, style, and excellent alliteration but did not quite make me guffaw:

Mistaken mutt munches Man's mangled meat
Neck Checker Wrecks Pecker
Romanian man named "Pet Lover of the Year."
Weenie Whacker Wildly "Wings" Wang
Chicken Choker Severs Stroker
CHICKEN MAKES MAN GO CLUCKING CRAZY
Man Minces Mistaken Member; Frisky Fido Feasts
Crazy Cutthroat Coot Clumsily Captures Clucker, Carelessly Cuts Cock; Confounded Cur Craftily Chews Cutlet
Local Man Chokes Chick, Chops Dick
Man Mauls Member as Mutt Munches, Fowl Play Suspected
Cock-a-Doodle-Don't
COCK-A-DOODLE-OOPS

And now for the top 5! (Drum roll........ CRASH!)

5) Tipsy Gypsy Confuses Prick for Chick (Courtesy Thes-P-N)
4) Cockamaiming (Courtesy Mark)
3) "COCK-a-doodle D'OH!" (Courtesy Derekstef)
2) Chicken Attacked! Tally-whacked! Gave The Dog A Bone! (Courtesy John-Mark)

And the grand prize winner:

1) Geezer Aims For Gizzard, But Hits His Trouser Lizard (Courtesy IHeNdRiXIsGodI)

For this effort, IHeNdRiXIsGodI wins a Morbid Fact Du Jour 10th Anniversary T-shirt! Thanks again to everyone who participated and stay tuned for more contests in the future.

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Morbid Trinket Du Jour!

Who among us can resist a Jesus Is A Zombie t-shirt? No, please don't answer that!

http://www.jesusisazombie.com/

Thanks to Remo for the link.

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Ghastly!

The next time you're involved in a high speed chase, please take a moment to put your seatbelt on. After all, you wouldn't want to end up like Damien Harrington (R.I.P.), would you?

http://asylumeclectica.com/asylum/morbid/archives/noseatbelt.wmv

Thanks to Dave for the link.

 


January 18, 2007

Today's Live Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Five workers at a Thailand factory were electrocuted when a live lead from a radio fell into a pickled mango storage tank. Workers were removing mangoes at the time. One was electrocuted instantly and the others died as they tried to help their colleagues.

Culled from: Strange Deaths

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See, this is a good example of how important it is in life to have morbid obsessions. When I was a kid, one of my favorite books to look through was an old First Aid book. I was fascinated by the pictures, which depicted potential hazards that one might stumble across in life, and I was particularly entranced by the photos of what to do in case of an electrocution. They showed someone laying across a live wire, and someone else taking a wooden broom handle and using it to move the first person off the wire. Now I naturally carry a wooden broom handle wherever I go, just in case this situation should reveal itself. I also carry several long sleeved shirts tied together in case I need to rescue someone from an icy pond. Yes, I have learned my lessons well.

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Morbid T-Shirt Shop Update

The Morbid Fact Du Jour Ebay Shop will be closed for a week while Jen is out of town. You can still purchase shirts from the shop, but orders will not be finalized and shipping will not occur until Jen returns to the fold after 1/25.

http://tinyurl.com/ya2bdv

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Ghastly!

Goreking.Com is a great forum on which to find the latest disturbing images. Squeamish need not apply!

http://goreking.com

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Morbid Art Du Jour!

Here's a great animation in which the artist draws a woman from the inside out. Wish I could draw like this...

http://www.pelourinho.com/movies/c003702/

Thanks to Letitia for the link.

 


January 19, 2007

Today's Ripping Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

A 16-year-old farmworker died a horrible death after being "swallowed" by a baling machine six days after he had started at the farm. Another worker, who saw the machine ripping apart Ricardo Mowries, has been having trouble sleeping since the accident. Jerome Geduld of the De Liefde farm near Wolseley was driving the baling machine in which Mowries's clothes got entangled about 17:20 on Monday, October 17, 2005. Mowries was decapitated, his right arm was broken and his right leg ripped off. Geduld said: "Ricardo was feeding the chaff into the machine and his jacket got caught in the machinery. His body was ripped apart within half a minute. It happened so quickly. My body was in shock and I was disorientated. It didn't know where I was." Geduld descibed the teenager as a "good worker", saying young workers didn't normally work with such big machinery. Ricardo's mother, Ragel Mowries, said she was working in the vineyard when she and other workers heard a loud bang. "Two workers came running. I told the others: but there should be three of them. I walked up to them and asked what had happened. They told me my child had died. I wanted to go to him, but Jerome said he was too badly injured; I should stay away. I heard that his head was lying 12 metres from the machine. I keep seeing images of how he died." Mowries said her son had asked the manager for a job because she couldn't afford to keep him in school after Grade 7. "It was only his sixth day at work. I'm heartbroken, but I must accept it." Albertus Olivier, organiser of the Food and Allied Workers Union in the Witzenberg district, said: "It is against the labour laws to allow such a young child to do such hard work. Such a dangerous machine must be operated by an experienced person." Flip Viljoen, the farm manager, said through his lawyer, Nico le Roux, that the boy "knew exactly what he should do". " He was merely a helper and didn't operate the machine." Le Roux said the case was being investigated by the labour department and the police. "It was a sad accident and we are supporting his family."

Culled from: News 24
Generously submitted by: Rene

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When I read stories like this, it almost makes me glad that the worst injury I'm likely to suffer in my job is carpal tunnel! *Almost.*

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Follow-Up Du Jour!

Betsy sends me a follow-up on the drunk driving accident that was featured on the January 14, 2007 MFDJ. The drunk driver who slammed into the limo and killed two people has been found guilty of second degree murder. The article has interesting photographs of the wreckage - remember, this is the wreck where the mother held the decapitated head of her daughter in her arms as she sat dazed on the side of the road after the crash. Horrid.

http://tinyurl.com/3apdxt

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Morbid Mirth Du Jour!

Net Disaster allows you to take the perfect revenge against your most-loathed websites! Hours of destructive fun!!

http://www.netdisaster.com/

Thanks to Magnoire for the link.

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Ghastly!

How fast do you have to be going to cut a car completely in two when you hit a tree? Looks like a bit over 90 mph to me...

http://asylumeclectica.com/asylum/morbid/archives/howfast.pps

Thanks to Narkitten for the Power Point Presentation.

 


January 20, 2007

Today's Fearsome Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Mary Queen Of Scots was executed by beheading in Fotheringhay Castle, Northhamptonshire on February 8, 1587. She had been accused by Queen Elizabeth I of plotting to ascend the English throne. Before the execution, the executioner, named Bull, knelt before her and asked her to forgive him. She did so, adding: 'for now you shall make an end to all my troubles'. Next she was required to remove some of her voluminous outer clothes lest they impede the executioner, and she exclaimed that 'she had never taken off her clothes in such a company!'

Her attendants helped her to discard her robes, to reveal a red velvet petticoat and a silk scarlet bodice. One of her women brought a Corpus Christi cloth, folded triangularly, and put it over her head as she reached out for the block. On seeing this, one of Bull's assistants moved her hands aside and held them lightly as she prayed, her head on the block.

When she stopped, Bull raised the fearsome axe but, whether daunted by the enormity of the deed he was about to commit or just inaccurate, the first blow glanced off the back of his victim's head, injuring her but fortunately rendering her unconscious. Raising the axe again, he brought it down on her neck, this time severing her head but for a little gristle which he cut with his knife. In accordance with tradition, he then lifted her head and proclaimed, 'God save the Queen', referring of course to Queen Elizabeth.

One of Bull's assistants noticed Mary's little dog emerge from under the dead queen's skirts and lie down between the severed head and body of its late mistress. Enticed away, it was carried out and the blood washed off it.

Culled from:The Book Of Execution
http://astore.amazon.com/theasylumeclecti/detail/0747245819/105-5925744-5795623

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Poor little dog!!

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Ghastly!

A teenage girl steals Daddy's car, goes for a joy ride, and loses control at a very high rate of speed. One moment's impulsivity leads to a dreadfully ghastly ending. I think that one viewing of these images does more for the cause of automotive safety than ten dozen MADD billboards. Definitely not for the squeamish. Not even for the slightly-less-than-squeamish!!!

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Wretched Recommendations!

Melissa has a graphic novel recommendation:

Meatcake Compilation
by Dame Darcy
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/1560975326/theasylumeclecti

"This graphic novel samples some of the best from the first seven issues of the long out of print Meatcake comics, and really isn't like anything else I've ever seen. Dame Darcy has a very Edward Gorey-inspired style, which fits with the plethora of creepy-funny characters she creates, including siamese twins Perfidia (a two-faced bitch) and Hindrance (a hinderance to Perfidia), and Strega Pez, a woman who speaks through pez candy which pop out of the bloody slit in her throat. The front endpaper gives you a sneak peak to what's to come: it shows in detailed pen and ink a scene of pretty young Edwardian women digging up and dissecting a corpse. The fairy-tale like stories are peppered with murder, madness... and humor. Dame Darcy says of her work: 'I pictured them living in a little town by the sea, where magic is logic, mermaids and siamese twins are just as normal as other girls, and everyone has endless reasons to be dripping or drinking delicious black blood in every issue.' It's really something every fan of the Victorian morbid should check out."

Sounds awesome!! Onto my wish list it goes...

 


January 21, 2007

Today's Demented Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

A 93-year-old Florida man apparently suffering from dementia probably won't face charges after running down a pedestrian and then driving with the man's body stuck through his windshield. Ralph Parker was eventually stopped at a toll booth on the Sunshine Skyway in St. Petersburg. A spokesman for the state attorney's office said Parker didn't appear to know what happened or where he was. The victim has been identified as a 52-year-old man. Parker's license was renewed in 2003. He had been living alone since his wife died in 1998.

Culled from: Associated Press
Generously submitted by: Katchaya

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You know, this fact really "speaks" to me because I grew up in a small retirement community in California. We knew that every first of the month, you had to be on guard because all the "benes" (Social Security Beneficiaries) would be out and about cashing their checks. (For some of them, this was the only day of the month they would drive.) Luckily, though, most of our drivers were so slow that you'd just bump off the bumper, you wouldn't end up sticking through someone's windshield. This guy was Heck On Wheels!

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Wretched Recommendations!

Penny has a film recommendation:

"You absolutely, positively, *MUST* see 'Lady Vengeance'. It's a foreign film, so those who enjoy Asian cinema will love it. And it is the most shocking, out-there, creepy 'do-these-people-know-they're-psychotic?" kind of storyline. I don't want to tell you too much, as it will spoil the plot twist. It starts out kind of slow... even I got frustrated with the plot progression, but OH MY GOD, did my patience pay off!!!!! Basically, this girl was sent to prison when she was nineteen for kidnapping and murdering a five-year-old boy. She was beautiful and kind-hearted, so it was a scandal when she was convicted. She spent nine years in prison, and when she is released, she makes up for lost time by making her 'amends' with the people involved in the whole sordid affair. I'm afraid if I say too much more, I'll ruin it for you. Please, please, please go out and get this movie right away. I swear to you, you won't be disappointed!"

Lady Vengeance (2005)

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Morbid Mirth Du Jour!

I never thought I'd find Quail Hunting so entertaining!

http://www.quailhuntingschool.com/flash.php

Thanks to Katchaya for the link.

 


January 22, 2007

Today's Frantic Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Hippolytus de Marsiliis, a sixteenth-century lawyer, is credited with the invention of a particularly subtle form of water torture. Having observed how drops of water falling one by one on a stone gradulally wore away a hollow, he applied the method to the human body. Victims were strapped down so that they could not move, and cold water was then dripped slowly on to a small area of the body. The forehead was found to be the most suitable point for this form of torture: prisoners could see each drop coming, and were gradually driven frantic.

Culled from: The History of Torture
http://astore.amazon.com/theasylumeclecti/detail/0312184255/105-1699331-5386841

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Update Du Jour!

FFA1234 isn't so sure about the validity of the January 20, 2007 MFDJ about the beheading of Mary Queen Of Scots:

"From what I've read (Antonia Fraser and other sources), the first blow given Mary Queen of Scots DID NOT render her unconscious, and that she cried out after the blow. At which point the executioner had to 'hack away' at his botched job before her head was separated from her body. This leaves the reader to imply that there were more than two strokes needed to finish the job. Also, when the executioner picked up the head, he was left with only a wig in his grasp, as the head toppled back to the floor. All in all, a pretty poor performance rating for the executioner!"

Oh, I hate when sources collide like this! But your story is more interesting, so let's go with that one.

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Morbid Mirth Du Jour!

It may be in German, but it's still the best forklift training video I've ever seen on the internet!

http://www.hugi.is/hahradi/bigboxes.php?box_id=51208&f_id=1000

Thanks to Windbob for the link.

Dov begs to differ: "Madame, I would have thought that a woman of your discernment would recognize the most horrid of all languages; German. That 'German' web site is not German but what I would guess is a Scandinavian language. Incredibly trivial complaints like this make my life complete."

Louise differs! "You were right and dov is wrong. Mwahahaha. The video itself is in German, though the host site and overall captioning is Icelandic. You can tell by the credits within the video itself. You can also tell if, like me, you have a German mother and Norwegian father and grew up with both languages. (This is really true.) btw, the narration is perfectly serious."

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Morbid Trinket Du Jour!

How could I have stumbled blindly through so many torturous years of life without ever being aware of the existence of Haunt World Magazine?

http://www.hauntedhousemagazine.com/

Thanks to Elizabeth for the link.

 


January 23, 2007

Today's Terrible Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

A terrible hailstorm accompanied a thunderstorm at Winnsborough, South Carolina, on May 8, 1784. Hailstones measuring up to nine inches in circumference fell, killing several people. They became the first recorded fatalities from a hailstorm in the United States.

Culled from: The Pessimist's Guide To History

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Wretched Recommendations!

Sam has another of those fun-filled, creepy Japanese movies for us to watch:

"Last weekend I had the chance to see a movie that I found quite interesting. It details the return of a woman, Hinako, to her hometown in Shikoku (it's like a Japanese equivalent of the southern United States-- it's a boring place, believe me). From then on she and the rest of the town residents are visited by the ghosts of dead relatives. Including Hinako's best friend, Sayuri. Not too much, right? Until we find out that Sayuri's mother, who is an exorcist, has gone so insane with grief over the death of her daughter that she is trying to raise the dead. And succeeds.

"It's a Japanese movie with English subtitles.

"Culture note: the original name of the island uses the characters for 'four' and 'country' (Žl‘), but in the movie title use the characters for 'death' and 'country' (Ž€‘). Also, there are buildings (especially hospitals) in Japan that don't have an official fourth floor because of the similar pronounciation for 'four' and 'death' -- both pronounced 'shi.'"

Shikoku (1999)

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Morbid Trinket Du Jour!

Here's a great shirt for all you anorexic goth chicks - a Tragic Suicide shirt complete with slit wrists!

http://www.sinistercandy.com/Tragic.htm

Sinister Candy has lots of great shirts for those of us with more than 1% body fat as well. I especially like their "Woodcuts de Morte".

http://www.sinistercandy.com/woodcuts.htm

Excellent!

Thanks to Desmodus for the link.

 


January 24, 2007

Today's Sunk Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

The Wilhelm Gustloff was a passenger ship built by the Blohm and Voss shipyards, and was named after the Nazi Wilhelm Gustloff. It was launched on May 5, 1937. On a mission to help evacuate Germans trapped by the Red Army in East Prussia, it was hit by three torpedoes from a Soviet submarine in the Baltic Sea on the night of January 30, 1945. The sinking remains the worst disaster in maritime history — it left over 9,000 people dead, more than half of them children.

Culled from: Wikipedia
Generously suggested by: Jeff

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Wretched Recommendations!

Mr. USA has a movie recommendation for us:

"I happened to see 'Tarnation' tonight... totally bizarre, thought you might like it."

The synopsis sounds promising:

"Filmmaker Jonathan Caouette's documentary (an admixture of snapshots, Super-8 footage, answering machine messages, video diaries, early short films and more) about growing up with his schizophrenic mother is culled from the 19 years of his life dealing with her illness. By turns, Caouette is ambivalent about his mother, expressing both love and pain and, bravely, the fact that there's more than one truth on view here."

Tarnation (2003)

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Morbid Trinket Du Jour!

Who among us could resist a delicious blend of Belgian white and milk chocolates cast from an actual human skull? Not a living soul, I would assume! Unfortunately, my eyes are far bigger than my pocketbook in this case... but perhaps you have room to splurge?

http://www.chocolateskulls.com/

Thanks to Chuck for the link.

 


January 25, 2007

Today's Botched Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Since 1983, the number of botched executions involving lethal injection have been more than double the amount caused by the electric chair.

Culled from: Last Suppers
http://astore.amazon.com/theasylumeclecti/detail/1559502177/102-7904436-5168106

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Wretched Recommendations!

gabby17 has a book recommendation to offer:

Cannibalism: From Sacrifice To Survival
by Hans Askenasy, Ph.D.
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/ASIN/0879759062/theasylumeclecti

"I thought you guys would find this book of interest. Here is an excerpt which you might like: 'The Nigerian Bafum-Bansaw tortured their prisoners before killing them by using bellows to pump boiling palm oil into their bowels and stomachs to make the meat juicier; at other times they pumped oil into a carcass and left it to marinate. Indonesian cannibals were partial to the soles. Roasted over hot ashes the penis was regarded as a great dish by some.'"

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Morbid Mirth!

Q: How do you get a baby out of a tree?

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A: You give a Mexican a stick and tell him it's a piñata!

You can blame David for that one.


January 26, 2007

Today's Cavernous Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Inventor Thomas Edison died of heart failure at age 84 at 3:24 a.m. on Sunday, October 18, 1931. Edison's employees reported that the usually reliable clock that dominated his cavernous laboratory stopped at 3:27 a.m., three minutes after his death.

Culled from: What A Way To Go

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Of course, it would be spookier if the clock stopped at EXACTLY the time of his death, but you never know, it could have taken him awhile to find his way back to the office... I *guess*...

lmc adds: "This is, I believe, the same clock that is in the Edison House up the road from me in Greenfield Village. They had the entire Edison House/laboratory shipped to Greenfield Village/Henry Ford Museum years ago and all of the original stuff is still in it. In fact, if I recall, they even placed all of the furnature as he had left it. I might have the facts wrong - but this is how I remember it from the years of going to the village and museum..."

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My Morbid Space!

The mission of Headsick Productions is "Making Gore Sexy". They do a damned good job of it too, if their My Space profile is any indication!

http://www.myspace.com/headsickproductions

Thanks to Sam for the link.

Incidentally, The Comtesse now has a My Space page of her own. Yes, you knew it had to happen eventually... You are all welcome to visit!

http://www.myspace.com/comtessedespair

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Morbid Mirth Du Jour!

Now, here's a fun game! I'm sure it's much more clever than the actual movie...

http://www.seed-of-chucky.com/game.html

Thanks to Deana for the link.


January 27, 2007

Today's Buggery Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Under the urging of Anglican Bishop John Atherton, the Irish House of Commons passed "An Act for the Punishment for the Vice of Buggery" on November 11, 1634. Seven years later, the good Bishop Atherton is himself the second man hanged under the Act.

Culled from: Rotten Weird News
Generously submitted by: Steve O'

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I see the more things change, the more they stay the same. Just ask Ted Haggard!

And speaking of injustice based on stupid morality laws, have you heard about the teenager serving 10 years in prison for receiving consensual oral sex? Ah, the Bible Belt...

http://www.talkleft.com/story/2006/12/19/103911/32

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Morbid Link Du Jour!

Oh, how much do we all wish we were on THIS jury???

http://www.cbc.ca/canada/british-columbia/story/2007/01/22/pickton-trial.html

Thanks to Lady Morgana for the link.

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Morbid Mirth!

Q: What has 4 legs and one arm?

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A: A Doberman on a children's playground!

You can blame David for that one.

 


January 28, 2007

Today's Symbolic Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

The Jews buried their dead, reserving cremation for criminals. The Christians followed the Jews in their abhorrence of cremation, regarding it as a pagan custom. A central tenet of Christianity was the resurrection of the body, and this belief could not be reconciled with cremation - though it must be emphasized that, for Christians, burial was a *symbolic* affirmation of resurrection and did not accord with the Egyptian belief that life in the other world depended on the *physical* preservation of the corpse. Ignorant of the symbolism, enemies of Christianity contrived to prevent the burial of Christian corpses and to burn them, so as to prevent resurrection. Christians themselves were not above using cremation as a bar to everlasting life: many years after his death in 1384, John Wycliffe, then regarded as a heretic, was exhumed and cremated and his ashes were thrown into the River Swift.

Culled from: Death: A History Of Man's Obsessions and Fears

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Then there are people like me, who abhor cremation because it's so damned BORING! No corpses to exhume, no cool gravestones, no DNA studies or viruses to replicate in the future. Blah, blah, blah!

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Morbid Site Du Jour!

Khyshey sends a fascinating link:

The Proceedings Of The Old Bailey

"This site gives you the opportunity to look through the trials held at The Old Bailey courthouse of London and, to make it even more fun, gives you a - 'On this day in ....'

"You can read about the history of the old court house, find out all about different crimes and punishments given, and how they were altered over time. Take for instance branding, which for a short time used to be done on the offenders cheek, but this making the newly branded unemployable, was changed back to the thumb. And if you are real lucky, you might even be able to use the search engine to find a relative! Unfortunately I am yet to find a link... Such a shame."

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Morbid Mirth Du Jour!

Lady Morgana sends an interesting tidbit:

A study conducted by UCLA's Department of Psychiatry has revealed that the kind of face a woman finds attractive on a man can differ depending on where she is in her menstrual cycle. For example: If she is ovulating, she is attracted to men with rugged and masculine features. However, if she is menstruating or menopausal, she tends to be more attracted to a man with scissors lodged in his temple and duct tape over his mouth while he is on fire. No further studies are expected.


January 29, 2007

Today's Nibbly Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

A woman receiving treatment for diabetes at a state-run hospital in eastern India lost one of her eyes after ants nibbled away at it. The patient recovering from a post-surgery infection shrieked for help as the ants attacked her on Sunday night, but nurses told her it was normal to feel pain from the infection. On Monday, the patient's family saw a gaping hole with swarming ants in it when they lifted the bandage on her left eye. Authorities of the Sambhunath Hospital in Kolkata said they were probing the incident. "It's not uncommon for ants to attack diabetic patients. We have set up a committee to investigate the unfortunate incident," hospital superintendent A. Adhikary said. Scampering rats and stray cats and dogs sharing bed space with patients are not uncommon sights at India's overcrowded state-run hospitals that are used by millions of poor and middle-class people.

Culled from: Reuters
Generously submitted by: Paradox

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Morbid Valentine Contest!

I've decided to try to hold a contest every month this year (let's see how long I keep this up). For the month of January we had the Morbid Caption Contest, and now for the month of February, I thought it would be fun to have a "Morbid Valentine" Contest. Whoever creates the best morbid Valentine image (as subjectively chosen by The Comtesse) will win a copy of Van Cosel, the story of one of the great romantics of our times: Count Von Cosel, who loved Elena Hoyos so much he dug her corpse up and took it home with him.

Van Cosel
By Tom Swicegood

Send your creations to valentine@asylumeclectica.com. Contest closes on February 12th with the results announced in the Valentine's Day edition of MFDJ. May the most morbid Valentine win!

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Morbid Mirth!

Q: What is more fun than stapling dead babies to the wall?

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A: Pulling them off.

You can blame David for that one.

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Death Metal Du Jour!

Val writes to tell me about a Chicago band of morbid note:

"I am not sure if you have hear of them but there is a band called Macabre that sings all about serial killers. It is the absolute greatest. Check them out."

http://www.murdermetal.com/


January 30, 2007

Today's Sad Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

Artist Jean Cocteau died of a stroke at age seventy-four in Paris, just seven hours after Edith Piaf expired. Upon hearing the news of his friend's death, he remarked, "I had a fever since this morning, and I must say that the death of Edith Piaf has caused renewed sadness and discomfort." A few hours later, Cocteau said, "The boat is going down." These were his last words.

Culled from: What a Way To Go

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What fabulous last words! I don't know how they get the timing so perfect. With my luck, I'll have some deeply profound last statement all ready and I'll say it when I *think* I might be going to die, but I'll be wrong, and then I'll have a few hours to kill and I won't want to say anything for fear that whatever stupid thing I say will be my last words, and will negate the profound and enigmatic statement I just made. And you can't repeat your last words twice, so I couldn't just say it again when I'm *really* going to die.

See, this is the Comtesse's version of "death anxiety" - it's not the fear of *dying*, it's the fear of dying without *style*!!

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Morbid Valentine Contest!

I've had a couple of questions about the contest, so apparently I didn't explain myself very well. The idea is to make an image to front a morbid Valentine's card. (I'd show you an example that I made a couple of years ago, but my webserver is giving me grief right now.) Whoever creates the best morbid Valentine card (as subjectively chosen by The Comtesse) will win a copy of Van Cosel, the story of one of the great romantics of our times: Count Von Cosel, who loved Elena Hoyos so much he dug her corpse up and took it home with him.

Van Cosel
By Tom Swicegood
http://astore.amazon.com/theasylumeclecti/detail/0595275338/102-7904436-5168106

Send your creations to valentine@asylumeclectica.com. Contest closes on February 12th with the results announced in the Valentine's Day edition of MFDJ. May the most morbid Valentine win!

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Ghastly!

Wendi sent me some ghastly photos which purport to show the end result of a 174 mph crash on a crotch rocket ("courtesy the Oklahoma Highway Patrol"). Proof that there is a speed at which even the use of a helmet is completely futile.

http://asylumeclectica.com/asylum/morbid/archives/bikecrash/ATT00346.jpg
http://asylumeclectica.com/asylum/morbid/archives/bikecrash/ATT00349.jpg
http://asylumeclectica.com/asylum/morbid/archives/bikecrash/ATT00352.jpg
http://asylumeclectica.com/asylum/morbid/archives/bikecrash/ATT00355.jpg

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Morbid Sightseeing!

Katie has a great recommendation for your next visit to Arkansas:

"I'm amazed no one's mentioned this place yet. I live in Arkansas and have visited the Crescent Hotel in Eureka Springs -- it's supposed to be one of the most haunted buildings in the States. They have regular ghost-hunting tours and suchlike. There's also a lovely morgue in the basement from its days as a hospital that killed its patients -- rip away the plaster in the walls and you can see bones. Unfortunately, I was only in the hotel for a few minutes, so I didn't get the chance to see much. It's also, sadly, very difficult to get into the basement to see the morgue and asylum (some of the hospital's patients also went insane; the quack doctor's cures affected their brains, so he basically tied them down until they flailed themselves to death). Hospital with a crazy doctor, haunted hotel, insane asylum, and morgue, all in one building? Morbidophile's dream!"

Indeed!! It sounds wonderful!

http://www.crescent-hotel.com/

http://www.prairieghosts.com/cresc.html

 


January 31, 2007

Today's Freaky Yet Truly Morbid Fact!

A Victorian man bled to death after accidentally cutting his throat on a broken dinner plate. The freak accident happened as the man, from Point Lonsdale, south-west of Melbourne, Australia, was taking the leftovers from his dinner outside to give to his dog. The 57-year-old tripped as he went out the back door of his home. "He was carrying a plate, like a china plate, he's tripped and had a tumble and the plate's smashed and he's been fatally injured," a police spokesman said. The man landed on a sharp piece of the plate, which cut him across the neck. "His wife was present and tried to help him," the spokesman said. Paramedics were called to the house, but the man had already lost a large amount of blood and was unconscious when they arrived. "It's horrible. What are the chances the plate is going to break and you are going to fall on it that way?" Rural Ambulance spokesperson Jessica Li said. "I know it was family members that called triple-zero and I'm sure they were trying to do what they could, but once we arrived there was nothing we could do," she said. The man died at the scene. "It's certainly one of those freak accidents, I've never seen one like that around this area," the police spokesman said. "I hope I don't see another one like it. It's just terrible."

Culled from: TheAge.Com
Generously submitted by: Bruce T.

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Is it normal for Australians to change tense in the middle of a sentence? Let's see ... "He was carrying a plate... he's tripped and had a tumble and the plate's smashed and he's been fatally injured." Very confusing! But then again, these are the descendants of criminals, so I suppose I should cut them a break...

(Of course, I only say this because I have tons of family in Australia, and I've suffered plenty of harrassment over the years for the way I pronounce words like "orange" and say things like "going to the restroom".)

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Morbid Valentine Contest!

The idea is to make an image to front a morbid Valentine's card. Whoever creates the best morbid Valentine card (as subjectively chosen by The Comtesse) will win a copy of Van Cosel, the story of one of the great romantics of our times: Count Von Cosel, who loved Elena Hoyos so much he dug her corpse up and took it home with him.

Van Cosel
By Tom Swicegood
http://astore.amazon.com/theasylumeclecti/detail/0595275338/102-7904436-5168106

Send your creations to valentine@asylumeclectica.com. Contest closes on February 12th with the results announced in the Valentine's Day edition of MFDJ. May the most morbid Valentine win!

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Morbid Song Du Jour!

Barbara T. submits a lyric for our consideration:

All Things Dull and Ugly

Monty Python

All things dull and ugly,
All creatures short and squat,
All things rude and nasty,
The Lord God made the lot.

Each little snake that poisons,
Each little wasp that stings,
He made their brutish venom.
He made their horrid wings.

All things sick and cancerous,
All evil great and small,
All things foul and dangerous,
The Lord God made them all.

Each nasty little hornet,
Each beastly little squid--
Who made the spiky urchin?
Who made the sharks? He did!

All things scabbed and ulcerous,
All pox both great and small,
Putrid, foul and gangrenous,
The Lord God made them all.

*******

Morbid Trinket Du Jour!

Now, here's the perfect broche to wear to your next church social! A fetus pin!

http://www.lunaparc.com/anat_and_repro/fetus_pin.htm

If that doesn't cut it, perhaps you'd prefer an enema bag, penis, colon, uterus or sperm and fallopian tube?

http://www.lunaparc.com/anat_and_repro/index.htm

Thanks to Keith for the link.

 



Vulgarities...